Skip to main content

By Adrienne Livingston 

One activity we have in our Girls Empowerment Curriculum is called the “Love Test”, which is based on a scriptural list of the attributes of love. We ask the girl to substitute the word “love” for our friend, girlfriend, boyfriend or other person’s name in each of the definitions of love.

Definition of Love based off of 1 Corinthians 13:4-8


  • Is patient
  • Is kind
  • Does not envy
  • Is not proud
  • Does not dishonor others
  • Is not self-seeking
  • Is not easily angered
  • Keeps no record of wrongs (forgives easily)
  • Doesn’t rejoice in evil
  • Protects
  • Trusts
  • Hopes
  • Perseveres

Teach your child to ask, “Is (name) patient? Is (name) kind?”, etc. Have them spend time on each question and answer it thoughtfully.

If the majority of the statements are really true of that person, then perhaps a healthy relationship could be built with him or her.

If many of the statements are not true, it may tell us that the relationship is not good for us and the person is not loving us well.

We suggest doing this test over a period of time to see if it is consistent or if it is changing for worse.

We specifically encourage teens and parents to look for:

  • Patterns of unhealthy behavior
  • Patterns of change, such as becoming consistently more jealous, envious, or violent

We all mess up once in a while, but the focus is on long-term character and healthy relationship potential.

Oh yeah, we can even test ourselves to see how good we are at loving others.


  • Share the link to this blog to your own social media and answer this question: If you did the test on yourself, what did you discover?